Thank you for tuning into The Bonneville Game! Before we get started, we want to give some content and trigger warnings. This audiodrama deals with mature situations and themes, such as violence, drugs, crime, sexual content, and adult language. It is a horror comedy so it will contain graphic horror which may not be suitable for all audiences. The following episode contains loud screaming and chewing sounds. Timestamps for the screams and chewing sounds can be found in the show notes. Listener discretion is advised.
INT. MINTY’S BEDROOM – NIGHT
SOUND CUE: Faint neighborhood sounds can be heard
ARAMINTA “MINTY” LAM, 25, is a bubbly Goth Girl.
She is joined by her best friends, LAURA BATES, 25, and INGRID SULLENBERGER, 24.
MINTY: I love it when the ghosts have a theme. It’s just fun when they have a thing.
LAURA: Me too! If I were a ghost, I’d want to be like that one clown ghost from Are You Afraid of the Dark. The one that smoked a cigar. I wouldn’t hurt the kids, just scare the shit out of them and throw a cigar at ‘em.
MINTY: He didn’t throw a cigar at them. He just smoked one.
LAURA: Whatever, same thing.
MINTY: No, I don’t think it is.
INGRID: I’d want to be known as a nice ghost that helps people.
MINTY: Of course you would, Ingrid.
INGRID: What’s that supposed to mean?
LAURA: What Minty means is that you’re an absolute sweetheart and no one is surprised.
MINTY: Listeners, comment with what you’d want your ghostly theme to be! Would you be like today’s ghost story, and be known for letting the livestock in the house? Or the ghost that will only listen to heavy metal? (Laughs) We already know Laura’s answer.
LAURA: I’d be making kids piss their pants, baby.
MINTY: That’s all the time we have for today—
LAURA: Wait, wait, wait, what about you?
MINTY: Uh, me? Well… I’d want to keep in touch with my family. Let them know I was okay. Maybe keep an eye on them.
INGRID: Aww, that’s so sweet.
MINTY: Okay, okay, no gushing on me. Next week, we’re going to start taking our adventures on the road. We’re going to be investigating these ghosts in person!
INGRID: (nervously) Yay.
MINTY: Stay spooky and we’ll see you next time on—
INGRID, LAURA, AND MINTY: The Night Owls of Philly!
INT. LAURA’S CAR – MORNING
SOUND CUE: Laura drives down the road
SOUND CUE: Minty is on the phone, listening to it ring
MINTY: (sighs) Please, pick up.
INGRID: (on the phone) Hey, this is Ingrid. Sorry, I can’t answer right now. Please, leave a message after the beep! Beep! (giggles)
SOUND CUE: BEEP!
MINTY: Ing? It’s Minty, but you already knew that. I just need to talk to you. I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean for things to get so out of hand. Call me when you can? Please?
SOUND CUE: Phone hangs up
LAURA: It’ll be okay, Mint. She just needs some time.
MINTY: I don’t know….
LAURA: Let’s just focus on the Retreat, huh? I’m sure this will blow over by the time we get back.
MINTY: (deep breath) You’re right.
LAURA: Of course I am. I’m always right.
SOUND CUE: MINTY and LAURA laugh
MINTY: There it is!
SOUND CUE: Laura pulling into the parking lot and turning off the car MINTY: We should record an opener before we go in.
SOUND CUE: Recorder switches on
MINTY: Hello, Owlets!
LAURA: Welcome to…
MINTY AND LAURA: The Night Owls of Philly!
MINTY: We’re here at the Bonneville Podcasters’ Retreat for the next two weeks. It is so far out in the woods, y’all.
LAURA: And it’s beautiful out here.
MINTY: Seriously. Gorgeous.
LAURA: And it’s being run by Annie Stephenson and Romina Rojas, the fabulous hosts of Info Dumping!
MINTY: So they basically took an old summer camp and made it a getaway for adults. I think they said they were inspired by all of those European art residencies.
LAURA: Except the government actually pays for those.
MINTY: Yeah, well, America, y’know?
LAURA: We’re gonna network and meet other podcasters.
MINTY: Mm! Since we’re deeeeep in the Bonneville Forest, we were thinking that it might be fun to play the Bonneville Game. If you don’t remember our episode about the Bonneville Game, here’s the cliff notes.
It’s a ritual that summons a spirit from the Other World, O’Malley the Smiling Demon.
If you do the ritual successfully, O’Malley will come to you and she might tell you what your future is. If you fail, she may come and kill you instead. Sometimes death will come quick, but she might take her time.
You can ONLY play it in the Bonneville Forest. People have been coming here from all over and plenty of people come back with nothing to show for it. Some don’t come back at all.
There’s a LOT of steps to this game. Don’t worry, I printed them out from the Creepypasta wiki. I actually had to go to Staples to do this. You have to wait until midnight though so it’ll be a little while before I get to that. Until then, I’m just going to enjoy being here at the Retreat.
LAURA: Unfortunately, Ingrid won’t be with us.
MINTY: She couldn’t get the time off work.
LAURA: Without further ado, let’s get in there and get this show on the road. MINTY: Agreed, madame.
SOUND CUE: Recording turns off
INT. THE LODGE – DAY
ANNIE STEPHENSON, 31, the convivial and secretive owner of the Retreat, welcomes them inside.
ROMINA ROJAS, 37, Annie’s serious and blunt BFF and business partner, stands beside her.
SOUND CUE: Recorder turns on
MINTY: We are standing with Annie Stephenson and Romina Rojas of Info Dumping! (to Annie) Annie, can I ask, why have the retreat in Bonneville? It’s so out of the way. Wouldn’t it make more sense to do this in Philly?
ANNIE: Bonneville’s my hometown! I grew up here and I even went to this camp as a kid. It was called Camp Seymour back then though. When I heard they shut it down, I was heartbroken. I immediately went to Romina about it.
ROMINA: She begged me to help her buy the place. I said no at first. It was like a… money sink?
ANNIE: I couldn’t really argue so we came up with the idea for the retreat. Get together with a bunch of cool podcasters, ask for a tiny little fee, and then have a great couple of weeks collaborating.
MINTY: Well, I’m sure that once this place takes off, you’ll make your money back in no time.
ROMINA: (unconvinced) I hope so.
MINTY: We’re also going to play the Bonneville Game while we’re here. It’ll be an on site adventure. I even went to Staples to print out the instructions!
ANNIE: You know about the Bonneville Game?
MINTY: Oh yeah, the horror community is obsessed with it.
ANNIE: I’m afraid I’m gonna have to put the kibosh on that.
LAURA: We don’t plan to go very far—
ANNIE: We are not letting people get themselves killed on our watch. If you get eaten by a bear or fall to your death over a cliff in the middle of the night, do it on your own time.
MINTY: Oh, uh… okay.
ROMINA: Thank you for your understanding.
ANNIE: (cheery) Now get on in the Lodge! There’s a whole room of podcasters to meet! SOUND CUE: Annie and Romina lead the way
SOUND CUE: Minty’s recorder turns off
INT. THE LODGE – DAY
SOUND CUE: People chatter in a single room
BROOKE: I like to think of myself as a champion for the victims.
SOUND CUE: Minty’s recorder switches on
MINTY AND LAURA: (whispering) It’s Brooke Calhoun!
LAURA: (whispering) For our listeners who might not know, Brooke is one of the hosts of Merry Murderers Murdering — a podcast about, well, murderers murdering.
MINTY: (whispering) I’ve been showing you their podcast videos though. I keep telling you we should do something like that for ours! They have a fancy camera set up on top of the audio.
LAURA: (whispering) I didn’t watch any of them.
MINTY: (whispering) What? Why?
LAURA: (whispering) I couldn’t stand Brooke. I always thought she was kind of a bitch.
MINTY: (whispering) Laura! …I mean, me too, but we can’t say that on the show. Not if we want to keep our sponsors.
LAURA: We’ll take it out in post, it’ll be fine.
SOUND CUE: Recorder switches off
CHILI: Brooke is the one who figured out who killed Leah Backer. Her ex-boyfriend BROOKE: I did, long before the police figured it out.
CHILI: O-M-G, Brooke, you are SO smart! I wish I was good at mysteries like you. SOUND CUE: Recording on
MINTY: (whispering) That’s Charlotte “Chili” Agnello, Brooke’s co-host. She’s nice, but a little… well. She’s not the sharpest tool in the shed.
LAURA: (whispering) A YouTuber convinced her that Charizards were real creatures for an entire year.
SOUND CUE: Recording off
CHILI: Did you try these baked apples? They’re full of sausage stuffing! It’s so good. BROOKE: Sorry, can’t. I’m gluten free, but I can take pics for my Insta. SOUND CUE: Picture snapping
BROOKE: Aaaand post!
SOUND CUE: Posting sound!
BROOKE: Wow, the signal up here is actually really good. I expected it to be a nightmare.
SOUND CUE: Minty and Laura approaching
CHILI: Hi! I love your dress, it’s so cute.
MINTY: Thank you. I’m Minty and this is Laura.
CHILI: Oh! You’re from the Night Owls of Philly, right? Is Ingrid here? MINTY: Um… no, I’m afraid not.
LAURA: She had to work. You two are from Merry Murderers Murdering, right? We really love your show.
BROOKE: Thank you, our show is pretty great.
CHILI: We really love your show too! I’ve listened to every episode. What brings you to the Retreat? Is it just networking or are there ghosts here?
LAURA: Well, we haven’t heard of any ghosts—
MINTY: But we have heard of the Bonneville Game!
CHILI: Oh! We know that one. Remember, Brooke?
BROOKE: I do. Leah Backer’s ex-boyfriend tried blaming her death on the Bonneville Game.
CHILI: But Brooke helped shine a light on him and how suspicious he is! BROOKE: Mhm, and that situation sorted itself out. Thanks to me. MINTY: But what if he didn’t do it?
BROOKE: (scoffs) Come on, Chili, let’s go get a seat and eat!
CHILI: Oh, okay. We’ll talk to you later. I wanna get your numbers later, too! MINTY: Um… sure.
SOUND CUE: Brooke and Chili walking away
LAURA: I told you. Absolute bitch.
INT. THE MESS HALL – EVENING
SOUND CUE: People all around are eating and chatting
MINTY: I swear, I will prove ghosts are real, even if it kills me!
LAURA: Leeet’s chill with that kind of talk, hm?
MINTY: Sorry, I get too excited sometimes.
LAURA: I know you do, but let’s walk it back a couple steps.
BEX: (shouting, other room) What the fuck is wrong with you?
LAURA: What the Hell?
SOUND CUE: Door opens! Bex enters
BEX: I don’t need your George Costanza fucked Chris Evans looking ass running around in my kitchen, trying to fucking snort a whipped cream can!
JUSTIN: How about you stop being a bitch?
SOUND CUE: Recording on
MINTY: (whispering) Holy shit, someone’s yelling at Justin Mansfield of Man Talk. LAURA: He’s the sexist pickup artist, right? Ewwww.
MINTY: I love watching commentary videos about him.
LAURA: I can’t even stand those.
ANNIE: Bex! Bex, I need you to calm down, please.
BEX: Tell these people to stay out of my kitchen.
ANNIE: Mr. Mansfield, I’m so sorry about this.
JUSTIN: I want to file a complaint about this crazy broke ass bitch. ANNIE: Romina will take you to the office to talk about all of this.
JUSTIN: Fucking basic ass hoes. Can’t handle themselves around men. She’s just angry she’s so ugly!
ROMINA: Please, come with me, Mr. Mansfield. We’ll get this sorted out. JUSTIN: You better!
LAURA: He’s leaving. You might as well turn the recorder off, Mint. SOUND CUE: Recording off
SOUND CUE: Romina and Justin exit
ANNIE: Bex, what the hell is the matter with you?
BEX: Fuck that guy and fuck you! If he comes back in my kitchen again, I’ll make sure he’s shitting out of two holes instead of one.
ANNIE: You know what kind of clout that guy has? He could sic his little online followers on you. They could ruin your life.
BEX: Jokes on them, I already did a speed run on ruining my own life. I challenge those little pricks to do worse.
ANNIE: And they could! Bex, you need this job. You think anyone else in this town is gonna hire you?
BEX: I could figure it out.
ANNIE: With all that debt can you afford to “figure it out?”
BEX: (more jovial, to crowd) Sorry about that, folks. You saw me get a little testy there. I’m Bex, and I will be cooking your meals for the next two weeks.
BROOKE: Pff. That was a little unprofessional, wasn’t it?
BEX: Well, I suppose my public relations are a little under developed compared to yours.
BROOKE: Are you making fun of me?
BEX: No, did you want me to be?
BROOKE: You do realize who I am, right?
BROOKE: Brooke Calhoun? Of Merry Murderers Murdering? I help uncover murders.
BEX: Oh yeah. Isn’t your podcast the one that got busted for reading from the wikipedia article?
BROOKE: No! We research our cases extensively! We get library books and everything.
BEX: ….You wanna make out?
ANNIE: Bex, back in the kitchen, now.
BEX: Fine. Just sit tight, everybody, dinner and dessert are on the way. SOUND CUE: Bex heads into the kitchen
ANNIE: Everyone, I am so sorry! Please, keep enjoying the hors d’oeuvres. Dinner won’t be much longer.
LAURA: Oof. I don’t envy the amount of damage control she’ll have to do. MINTY: No kidding….
PAUL: Honey, I think it’s your turn to say grace.
GRACE: I believe it’s your turn.
PAUL: How about we do it together?
GRACE: That is a brilliant idea.
PAUL AND GRACE: Bless us, O God. Bless our food and our drink. Since you redeemed us so dearly and delivered us from evil, as you gave us a share in this food so may you give us a share in eternal life.
SOUND CUE: Recording on
LAURA: Ugh, fucking Paul and Grace Baird are here.
LAURA: They have that Christian podcast, what the Hell was it called? Podcast of Milk and Honey, I think? They just go around telling people how to be good Christians. Spoilers, it’s by being a bigot.
MINTY: Oof. Gross. I do think the cross necklace she has is really pretty though. I’ve never seen one like it before.
LAURA: Cross necklace?
MINTY: Yeah, it’s gold but has the letters GB etched into it.
LAURA: Oh. I see.
MINTY: I bet the GB is for her name, right? Grace Baird?
LAURA: I wouldn’t know.
SOUND CUE: ASMR tapping on a water bottle
TIERNEY: (sotto voce, ASMR style) Hi guys, how are you today? I hope you’re doing super duper great. Welcome to ASMR with Tierney McElfresh. I’m at the Bonneville
Podcasters’ Retreat and, today, I’ll be eating the collard green wraps, mushroom parmigiana, and a brownie. I am so frigging’ excited for this.
SOUND CUE: Eating sounds
SOUND CUE: Recorder turns off
MINTY: Fundie Christians on one side and an ASMR Mukbang on the other. This spot is cursed.
SOUND CUE: Minty and Laura picking up their trays to leave
INT. KITCHEN – EVENING
SOUND CUE: Bex cleans dishes as nature sounds can be heard through the window LAURA: He’s so cute! What was his name again?
BEX: Serotonin. Sera for short.
MINTY: He’s such a grumbly growly little old man! His face looks like a Muppet! SOUND CUE: Serotonin snorts.
LAURA: It really does! Aww, and he’s so stinky.
BEX: (warmly) Yeah, he’s my stinky little man.
MINTY: Is he missing his eyes?
BEX: Yeah, they weren’t being particularly useful so the vet removed them. LAURA: Aww, you sweet little eyeball-less baby.
SOUND CUE: Serotonin continues to snort softly
MINTY: Sorry, I got sidetracked by this cute widdle man. As I was saying, what makes the Bonneville Game so unique is it’s one you can only perform here, in the Bonneville Forest. If I do it just right, I’ll be able to see O’Malley.
BEX: Sounds like a bunch of people are just seeing Old Lady Rags and thinking she’s a ghost.
LAURA: Old Lady Rags?
BEX: This old broad that lives in the woods around here. She’s lived out in this forest most of her life.
MINTY: You think she knows anything about the Bonneville Game?
BEX: Iunno. Probably. What was it you wanted from me anyway?
MINTY: Excellent question! We’ve been gathering the stuff we need for the ritual. We already have a large mirror, three chairs, two candles, salt, salt water, a cell phone—
BEX: Jesus Christ, is making a trip to Ikea part of the fucking ritual? MINTY: We need two eggs. Could we borrow some?
BEX: Borrow? You giving them back?
BEX: Ah, take ‘em.
MINTY: Thank you, Bex! You’re the best.
BEX: I am.
MINTY: I promise I’ll replace it.
BEX: They’re eggs. It’s not mi—and you’re hugging me.
MINTY: Thank you again!
SOUND CUE: Minty exits
LAURA: Sorry about that, she gets a little over excited.
BEX: So this is just… what you do, huh?
LAURA: You could say that. We’re like… urban explorer ghost hunters. BEX: How do you urban explore in a podcast?
LAURA: With, uh, with a lot of talking. Oh, sorry this is out of left field, but I love your tattoos!
LAURA: It’s too bad Ingrid isn’t here. She’s a tattoo artist and she’d love to see them. BEX: Uh, shouldn’t you catch up to your friend before she gets too far ahead? LAURA: Right! Thanks again for the eggs. And thanks for lunch, it was delicious. BEX: Don’t mention it.
LAURA: See you around!
SOUND CUE: Laura hurries out
BEX: (to Serotonin) What a bunch of weirdos. Right, Serotonin?
SOUND CUE: Serotonin snores
BEX: Yeah, that’s right. You’re a good dog.
EXT. BONNEVILLE FOREST – NIGHT
SOUND CUE: Crickets chirp
SOUND CUE: Recording on
MINTY: Hey there, owlies. Laura and I are in the middle of the Bonneville Forest. LAURA: It’s both spooky and magical.
MINTY: Just the way we like it!
LAURA: It’s close to midnight so we’re going to be playing the game soon. According to the instructions, this is where the veil between the worlds is at its weakest point.
MINTY: It says it can be whenever after midnight which is hilariously vague for a demon summoning ritual.
LAURA: Now remember, kids, Minty and I are demon summoning professionals. Don’t try this at home.
MINTY: They can’t do it at home.
LAURA: I meant in general—
MINTY: Because you have to be in the Bonneville Forest.
LAURA: No, I know, I just—It’s time to play! We printed out the instructions just to make sure we got it right.
MINTY: We had to go to a Staples to do this.
LAURA: Minty, take it away!
MINTY: (deep breath) We have everything we need: a large mirror, three chairs, two candles, two eggs, salt, and salt water. It says to wait until midnight… And it… is midnight right about… now!
“Place the chairs in front of the mirror,” check. “Light only one candle. The other is meant to be a dark mirror of the other.”
SOUND CUE: Lighting a candle
MINTY: Got it, only one candle lit. “Don’t look in the mirror yet. Put salt water in your mouth, clap three times, and spin in a circle each time. Spit the salt water as you spin.” Okay!
SOUND CUE: Minty spins and claps. Clap! Spit! Clap! Spit! Clap! Spit!
MINTY: “Throw one egg at a nearby tree as a symbol of sacrifice, and then bury the second egg for protection.” It doesn’t say which tree…. Guess it doesn’t matter then. You do the honors, Laura.
LAURA: With pleasure.
SOUND CUE: Spat! The egg hits the tree
MINTY: And I’ll bury the second.
SOUND CUE: Minty digging and Laura walking over to sit down
SOUND CUE: Scraping dirt
MINTY: There! Done! And then it says to chant…
MINTY AND LAURA: “O’Malley, O’Malley, O’Malley, don’t dilly dally. Come tell me my future in the mirror, make my life a little more clearer.”
MINTY: Spin three more times, but don’t clap.
SOUND CUE: Minty spins three times
MINTY: “Make a circle of salt around you.”
SOUND CUE: Minty opens salt and pours it out
MINTY: “Now you may sit and look in the mirror. If you look in the mirror, you should see O’Malley the Smiling Demon. If you do, do not speak. If you speak, she will kill you. If you stay silent, she will tell you your future, but it will never be clear if she’s telling the truth or lying to you. After she finishes and disappears, you must immediately leave the forest and not look back. You can return for the mirror and chairs in the morning when it’s safe.” Okay. Going to look in the mirror now.
MINTY: Ugh! Nothing! This sucks.
LAURA: Damn, I was hoping it would work. Sorry, Owlies, looks like this is a bust.
MINTY: Let’s not totally write it off, maybe we just have to try again? But (yawns), for now, I think it’s time I hit the hay.
LAURA: Well, Owlets, that’s all we have for today’s episode of…
MINTY AND LAURA: The Night Owls of Philly!
SOUND CUE: Recording off
MINTY: God, I am beat.
LAURA: (Yawns) Me, too. Maybe we can try again tomorrow night. MUSIC TRANSITION
INT. MINTY’S CABIN – NIGHT
SOUND CUE: Recording on
SOUND CUE: Crickets chirp
MINTY: I just heard something outside of my cabin. I am freaking out you guys. It has to just be an animal, right? We’re in the woods, so that makes sense. Oh fuck, what if it’s a bear? Fuck, fuck, fuck.
MINTY: I don’t see anything outside the window. I can’t go out there, right? Tell me not to go out there…. I’ll take your silence as a “Don’t go out there.” I don’t really even know what I heard, you know?
SOUND CUE: Strange screaming!
MINTY: Nope. Staying right here. That was a scream and I am not getting murdered. SOUND CUE: BAM!
MINTY: (screams) Shit, that was right against the back door. I’m out. I’m out, Owlies, I’m not gonna be its victim. I’m heading to the nearest cabin to get help. It looks like whatever that was isn’t out front.
EXT. MINTY’S CABIN — NIGHT
SOUND CUE: The front door is thrown open
SOUND CUE: Minty running through grass
MINTY: Oh God. Fuck!
SOUND CUE: Minty trips over something
MINTY: (grunts in pain as she hits ground) What the hell did I just trip over? SOUND CUE: Minty screams
INT. LAURA’S BATHROOM – NIGHT
SOUND CUE: Rain starts to fall outside
LAURA: Ugh, rain? Now? (sighs) Hopefully it’ll clear up by morning. SOUND CUE: Scratching on wood. Scratch. Scratch. Scratch. LAURA: Goddamn it, did some kind of animal get in here?
SOUND CUE: Knocking
LAURA: (gasps) What—
SOUND CUE: Window smashes and glass hits the floor
LAURA: What the fuck!
SOUND CUE: Laura takes off running
EXT. LAURA’S CABIN – NIGHT
SOUND CUE: Door is thrown open
LAURA: (panting) Help! Help! Somebody, help me!
SOUND CUE: Something grabs Laura’s leg and she falls face first into the mud LAURA: (panicking, spitting out mud) Get off me!
LARK: I’m here! I’ve got you!
LAURA: It’s behind me! It’s… not there. It was right there!
LARK: Lark. It’s Lark.
LAURA: Lark… I-I… There was something back there. I swear!
LARK: Come on, let’s get inside.
The Bonneville Game was created, directed, written, and sound designed by Kat Walker Shea with sound design assistance from Meg Molloy Tuten and Ashlee Craft
Produced by Ashlee Craft, Kat Walker Shea, Exquisite Lore, and Box Office Poison Productions
Opening Theme Music by Melanie Carroll Dolci
Transition Music and Ending Music by Vivek Abhishek
Featuring the voices of…
Araminta “Minty” Lam — Rachanee Lumayno as Minty Lam
Krystal Gem as Laura Bates
Kat Walker Shea as Ingrid Sullenberger and Bex McQuoid
Allegra Rodriguez Shivers as Lark Pepperberg
Lena Garcia as Romina Rojas
Becca Lerman as Annie Stephenson
Michelle Kelly as Brooke Calhoun
Liza Dally as Chili” Agnello
D Sumner as Justin Mansfield
Weylinn Ashby as Tierney McElfresh
Stefon TV1 as Paul Baird
And Lauren Kong as Grace Baird
We also want to give a special thanks to our patrons over on Patreon! Maya Jimenez
Thanks for listening to The Bonneville Game! We’ll be crowdfunding soon in order to bring you the rest of season 1. Keep an eye out and remember to stay spooky!